Saturday, December 18, 2010

Faturday

Do you know what today is?  Do you KNOW what today is?!?!  That's right.  It is the 18th.  Satur-flippin'-day the 18th.

You probably think I'm panicking about Christmas.  And I am.  But I also have a deeper, more panicky panic (that is clearly tampering with my vocabulary) stewing.  A bridesmaid dress awaiting my bloated-with -800 pounds-of-Christmas-cookies body.  That I have to squeeze into in four weeks. 674 hours.

Nobody will even be looking at me, I know... the bride will be breathtaking and stealing the show as it should be.  It's just that as you know from Wednesday's post, I'm already a zitty mess.  And here's the kicker.  I'm the oldest bridesmaid!  By like five years.  So it doesn't seem fair that I would have to play the role of oldest and plumpest (and zittiest).  Hence the panic.

The thing is I don't care enough to actually stop eating the chocolate covered pretzels, the fudge, the sugar cookies, or the peanut brittle.  So sign me up for Fattest and Oldest.  And pass the figgy pudding.

Ok, George Costanza.  But did you have to stand up in a wedding?  Didn't think so.

6 comments:

Becky Jane said...

What a funny post...I totally know where you're coming from...so please pass the figgy pudding when you're done!

Merry Christmas, Becky Jane

Jasmine said...

Funny post and I also know where you're coming from. So maybe we can all hang out and have some pudding. ;-)

Thanks for passing by Far Above Rubies.

God bless,

Jasmine

KatieMay said...

Too funny...I love Seinfeld...You'll look great. Enjoy the holidays!

Sara McGinnis said...

Love your blog! Such a fun idea. Send me an email, perhaps we can do a little co-promotion of blogginess!

http://www.motherhoodtohollywood.com/

saramcginns at live.com

Carla said...

You are thin and beautiful. I hadn't seen this - funny!

Nicki Woo said...

I say pass the figgy pudding.

You are cute as all get out, you have cuteness seeping from your pores. I'm telling you, the bride will have nothing on you.

go eat some fudge.