Get Wet

This is such a Willy Wonka idea! Gum that changes flavor? I know what I'm asking for for Mother's Day! You know what this commercial is missing though? Flava Flav. He'd be a totally appropriate spokesperson because Stride is so funkadelic and Flava is ultra-funkadelic. Plus it'd be fun to see him get a cup of water in the face. Who else would I like to see get doused? Well, since you asked:
Stanley Kubrick (everything you do freaks me out to no end!)
Jennifer Granholm (she could take a few cups in the face on behalf of all politicians)
Sam Bernstein (this is turning into a Michigan-specific list. Sorry out of staters. Sam is a crazy sleazy lawyer, whose ads are inescapable and poorly made).
People who throw their hands up in disgust when they want my parking spot and think I'm taking too long getting my kids into their car seats (this has happened to me more than once believe it or not- maybe some steamy water for them).
The entire San Jose Sharks team (frozen water seems appropriate for you- ice cubes to the face!)

Rescue Me, I Want Your Tender Charms

Every now and then the world becomes a better place because of a mere 1 minute, 1 second long commercial. This is such an ad:


Isn't your world brighter now? And safer too I think. It led me to reevaluate the strength of my friends should I ever need them to come flip my car over (Wimpy, you're out; Brutus, you're my new ICE number). And thank goodness he points out the importance of good rescue music! They never did find a winner so I'd like to make a few suggestions:
I Get Knocked Down by Chumbawamba (don't be discouraged if you fall rescuers! It happens to the best of us!)
Allstar by Smash Mouth (Cruelly ironic though, if being rescued after getting mouth smashed.)
Glamorous by Fergie (what? so I prefer an upscale rescue- what's it to ya?)
Sexyback by Justin Timberlake (if I'm flipped over in a car I can't think of anything I'd rather have than my Sexy back).
Rescue Me by Zebrahead (an obvious one, I know, but it's also got a good rescuing beat. Click below to hear).

Pining For An Arbor Day Ad?

Look what I was able to dig up in honor of this hallow (or should I say hollow) day! Obviously an old ad, made a log time ago. These days they'd really have to spruce things up. I'm also posting a random Virgin Mobile ad because there are singing animals and you know I can't resist that shizzle, so just humor me if you wood. If Virgin Mobile actually meant this to be a sale generating ad however, they were barking up the wrong tree!! Okay, okay, let me just leaf you with this: if you normally only plant flowers, try branching out and planting a tree!

A New Kind of Shake and Bake

Grilling at the Mitchell household will never be the same again thanks to Weber's new (very timely!) commercial. I can't wait to try some of these sweet moves with the spatula. Dancing with props has never been cooler. So don't be surprised if you see me whipping out a cooking utensil and swatting my behind at the next wedding reception, or when you run into me out clubbin'. (Actually if you see me out clubbin' be surprised, but not because of the spatula).
Molly recently humiliated me in front of a group of moms I did not know. The other sweet little munchkins were dancing innocently in a circle as kids do- jumping up and down, waving arms, etc. My Molly? Starts galloping backwards, butt out, and spanking herself. Apparently I should have sent a casting video to Weber instead of holing up in embarassment.
Before you click on this, stand up, grab the nearest hiney swatter, (no spatula handy? try a ruler, wooden spoon, or rolled up magazine) and get ready to break it down in honor of charred steaks, burgers, and brats everywhere.

Putting the PC in PCS

It's high time Metro PCS gets their due. They've always had funny commercials, but the new ad series with Tech and Talk Indians (Ranjit and Chad... obvious choices) is as funny as any talking animal ad I've seen. There was no doubt in my mind the Cavemen TV series spun off from Geico commercials would flop (I think my exact words were, "I'd rather be clubbed in the head than watch this"). But Ranjit and Chad? Now that could be a series. Or a movie. I'm thinking Harold and Kumar meets Anchorman. Who's with me? Oh, you want to see the commercial first? My readers are wise investors!


I'm thinking Will Ferrell or Adam Sandler to play the guy in the tube. Or maybe Russell Crowe, just because I'd like to see him in a tube.

Three Cingular Sensations

I had a glorious flashback today. Three of them to be specific. Do you remember the triplets from the Cingular ads? Of course you do! They reached the zenith of commercial celebrity. That is, they landed a few actual interviews with teeny-bopper 'zines. How do I remember this? Because I was hanging out (this was before high schoolers were "chillaxing") at my friend's house, thumbing through said teeny-bopper rags, when my friend came to an article about the Karshner trips (Nick, Craig, and Ryan- perfect boy band names. Why they never started a band to tour with O-Town is beyond me). So friend wants to kiss all three boys. Their pictures, that is. Since there are three of them, she started with Boy A and slid her face across the page, ending with Boy C. The result? A nasty papercut under her nose.

In researching for this blog entry I googled the Karshner trips (they've made quite a name for themselves in the gay community!) but couldn't find what they're up to these days. Still modeling for Abercrombie? That would be some kind of record- especially since they're 28 now, and I don't think A&F has models over the age of 19. So who knows? They're like the Bobby Fischer of attractive triplet actor/models. But I did find this little blurb on them: http://www.freakncool.com/alphahunk/18/karshner-triplets-alpha-male-of-the-day/ Don't want to read it? That's cool- let me just pull out this little bit for you: "The story line of their last commercial that they just finished filming (and which will air this fall) will be about their characters going to college; one of them is heading for a university like Yale or Harvard, and the other two are heading for junior colleges".
Now watch the commercial and tell me if you get the same vibe. Let me just say first that I don't think you will. I think you will find the above quote hysterical, stupid, and quite unfounded. But please, correct me if I'm wrong.

Sun Chips Say What?! (More On SC's New Bag)

When I went to "x" out of YouTube just now, I noticed a slew of Sun Chips videos on the side of my screen with titles like, "Sun Chips LOUD" and "New Sun Chips Bag Will Wake the Dead". So I clicked for the fun of it. As I said it my previous post- I support the crinkly new bag because it entertains Adi while I shop, which is priceless for me. However, knowing there are so many individuals who take issue with the new bag, I feel I would be remiss should I not give my readers both sides of the crunchy bag story. I picked this gentleman (kid?) as spokesman for all anti-crinkly-bagonites. His disdain at the end speaks volumes to this very important issue. If you ask me, he has a bit of a chip on his shoulder. Hee hee.