Tell Me Sweet Little Lies

I forgot who I was yesterday.  I lost myself in a moment of dumb bravery.  I watched Pretty Little Liars.  And not just any Pretty Little Liars.  The season finale.  The scariest episode of the season.  The fearful climax.  Stupid Jules.

I made Jim watch with me and mistook his presence for a free courage pass.  Nightmares ensued the entire night.  Seriously, I dreamed of every possible creepy scenario the PLL writers could go from here.  ABC Family?  Are you reading?  I could write for you guys literally, in my sleep.  From my REM to your storyboards. 

But this happens every now and then.  Every once in a while I fall off my nut and like to play make-believe I'm a brave.  Another recent example is my book selection, The Tale of Halcyon Crane (see sidebar).  Scary freakin' story (for me, mind you.  It could be all marshmallows and bunnies for you).  You'd think after 31 years, I'd know I'm a pansy and not put myself through the ringer like this (haha.  Ringer.  If you saw PLL last night you know somebody else got put through "the ringer" so to speak), but alas!  I still confuse myself with a person who has a spine.

Speaking of confusion, I was terribly confused when this commercial turned out to be for Dodge.  I mean, am I crazy or are those Twix candy bars in the spotlight there at the beginning?  I was all pumped up for a Twix commercial.... I don't get nearly so excited about vehicles.  Unless they come with a free Twix.

It's a Dog Eat Carrot World

It turns out I am not any braver in 2011 than I was in 2010.  Pretty Little Liars starts its new season tonight and the previews already have me wetting the couch (because I'm too scared to get up and brave the bathroom.  When I walk in, the door makes the shower curtain move, convincing me somebody is in the shower waiting to kill me at my most vulnerable toilet moment).  On the other hand, I really, really want to know what happens this season.  What is a scaredy-pants to do?

Getting braver was not one of my New Years Resolutions.  I didn't exactly make any specific resolutions.  Weight-wise I just try year-round not to get too... well, round.  However, I am resolving to help my dog lose a couple Elle Bees.  She is being fed the "healthy weight" version of her food (I'm sure it's delicious!), I'm putting her on the treadmill daily (um, it's COLD outside.  When it gets above freezing again maybe we'll venture down the road), and I'm brushing at least a pound of fur off her daily (wouldn't it rock if we could shave a pound of hair off our legs daily?!)*

So that's the resolution I made.  To better someone who's not me.  Are any of you forcing a resolution on somebody?  It's fun!  Allie will be wearing her skinny jeans in no time:


*On second thought, that probably wouldn't rock as much as I originally thought.  That's actually very gross.