Good Hands and Good Armpits

Let's do a little compare and contrast exercise, shall we? I need your opinion here. Is the Old Spice commercial supposed to be a semi-spoof on Allstate? I mean both are black men, both ask viewers hypothetical questions, and both have deep, dreamy voices. (What?!)

Exhibit A:


Exhibit B: (I love that he says 'bajillion' because I say that at least once a day. For instance, "Molly, I've told you a bajillion times not to smash chapstick onto the TV screen!")

Chugga Chugga Chew Chew!

I'm loving this commercial right now. It's a little risque I know, but not so awkward that you just want to die if your parents happen to be in the room when it comes on. (Do you hear me Axe? What say you put a little warning on before your ads so we can suddenly hear the baby crying or something?) Also, it's still above the heads of tykes so there aren't any awful questions or comments from the wee little peanut gallery (i.e. the "Naked Daddies" comment from my Feb. 5th blog entry). So it's just the right amount of subtle and funny. Happily, the actors all seem to be of an appropriate age too (maybe they should call it DenAdult instead of DenTeen- haha).

Lovely Day For A Guinness

Happy St. Patrick's Day! Adbitters are in luck again today that I didn't opt for a vlog, otherwise you'd be stuck listening to my best leprechaun impression. As it is, you are about to read a super cheesy joke:
Q: Why shouldn't you ever iron a shamrock?
A: You don't want to press your luck!!

Tee hee hee! I do have a St. Patty's Day vent however, now that I have your attention. In honor of this day, msn.com listed the 12 hottest redheads. Here's the link- I'll give you a moment to check it out: http://wonderwall.msn.com/movies/the-top-12-hottest-redheads-7186.gallery?GT1=28148
Did you see anything wrong with that?!?! I mean, besides Conan O'Brian making the list? (I'm a fan but come on! They must have been really hard pressed to find 12 gingers). Which brings me to my next point: their number one hottie was a FAKE red! Seriously? Cut her, cut Conan, and make the list a Top 10 like every other respectable list on the planet. Such a 'sault. It's like saying Madonna's version of American Pie is the best song ever. It can't be the best song ever! It's a cover!!!! (Although admittedly, Hendricks rocks her locks ten times better than Madge rocked that song).
Thanks for bearing with me for that. I'm now happy to present you with a couple Guinness commercials in honor of March 17.


Note: I bet in Ireland they cut the part about it not being the smartest idea to drink 6 bottles at once. They drink 6 bottles of Guinness before getting out of bed in the morning, right?

Right On.... Mark

This is the kind of mother I aspire to be. Not the Asian part- I think I'm SOL there, but that she's in a tree (sporting a cute camo ensemble) spying on her daughter, flipping spaghetti onto the guy (who is undoubtedly a scheming little weasel), and rockin' out during an Oreo-centered girls night. A few questions for Wendy though: why doesn't your daughter scream at you in horror for your embarrassing antics? And how is it that this guy (really tall for an Asian by the way!) is sticking around? Also, is your daughter watching Dora the Explorer while you do her hair? Because that's the only way I can get Molly to sit still for pigtails.

Spring It On

Today I woke to birds chirping outside my window- glorious! Another tell-tale sign that Spring may be here? Most the snow in our yard is gone, leaving a field of dog piles that hid in the snow all winter long. So, I grabbed the shovel and headed outside to rid the yard of the poop. (Readers, try not to be jealous of my ultra-glamorous life). Molly wanted to help, but I told her she couldn't walk on the grass (it was hard enough dodging the dung by myself, let alone steering her clear of it all). She asked several times to help and finally she hung her head sadly and said, "Mommy, when will I be old enough to pick up poop?" I'm happy to be documenting this story because I will undoubtedly need to use it someday when the time comes to pass the shovel.

"But what about a commercial Jules? Give us an Ad Bit!" Fiiiiiiine! How's this for timely: Red Robin! Their commercials are always cute, their onion rings are on the brink of lunacy (talk about glorious- they come on a stick!), they're named after the Michigan state bird, but more than anything I love their jingle. "Red Robin- yummmmm". Whomever came up with that was either an idiot or a genius. I'm going with genius.

Hi 5

Oh, if you read the previous post and are curious about the aforementioned "5" commercial, here it is. Very Sprite-y, yes?

Stanley Kubrick Does Sprite

Today I saw an ad for "5" gum (which I believe is the Gucci of gum- so sophisticated!) and I totally flashed back to the Sprite commercials from a few years ago! Do you guys remember these? They're very... Clockwork Orange-y. Take this one for instance:

The eyeball is a MOUTH!!! Clearly the Sprite advertising team is smoking some trippy stuff. Not convinced? Sip on this:

It just leaves me so conflicted. I mean, Sprite was always such an innocent soda. It was the children's beverage at every social event I attended in my youth. Caffeine-free so we didn't go nuts (coulda just waited a few years and watched their lobotomy-esque commercials), and clear so we wouldn't stain our fancy clothes or carpet. But now! It's a drink represented by weird guys performing seemingly psychotic tests and even weirder guys snapping their fingers angrily at viewers. All that's missing are the Oompa Loompas.