Animal House

If I saved the Commercial Fairy's life and she granted me one wish?  This would be it.  We've got a farm full of chatty animals, including one adorable pig (the same one that starred in the Geico commercial perhaps?  Look out Babe, there's a new piggy in town).  So naturally, I already love the ad and then they make a funny "under our wing" pun!  True, they should have thought of that earlier, but I'm willing to overlook their punny negligence in return for the cow scene.  If I have another baby I'm thinking I may borrow her pump. 



Just in case you were sorely disappointed this post had nothing to do with John Belushi, here's an Animal House clip.  Makes me want to have a toga party- who's in?

Label Me Healthy

Good news!  I'm functional again!  Well, as functional as I was pre-flu anyway.  My appetite is back and I'm so happy I had the presence of mind to snag a couple pieces of my mom's homemade blueberry pie in anticipation of said appetite.  Yum.

I have meetings galore this week in anticipation for preschool and Sunday school (I'm teaching this year- Lord help my little 4 year old students!)  This is forcing me to frantically cram all the organizing I promised myself I would do over the summer, into this short week.  Organizing, of course, requires labels and Avery is the Cadillac of labels, right?  But I'm quite disappointed in their latest commercial (and as you know, that carries a lot of weight for me)!  Luckily, they have another commercial that is creepily semi-funny, so I guess I'm still willing to purchase them.  For now.  But if I ever get as mean as the wife in this first commercial, please.  Please!  Take my cute, fully stickalicious, fun, colorful labels away from me.  I wouldn't deserve them and neither does this chick.

McContagious

It's the weekend!  I usually love to participate in a blog hop on Saturdays, but it wasn't meant to be today as this is the very first moment I've been on a computer all day.  A computer.  Not my computer, mind you.  Let me explain.  My wonderful, superfun, don't-see-her-nearly-enough sister is visiting this weekend from Chicago and staying at my parents' house.  I had a duathlon on the other side of the state this morning, but I hightailed it out of there ASAP so I wouldn't miss one single moment of time with my brother and sister- it's so rare for us to all be together.  I made a conscious decision NOT to bring my computer.  "I won't have a second to spare!"  "I'll be basking in the sunshine that is sibling love and laughter!"

Except I seem to have the stomach flu.

So while everybody is downstairs giggling, chatting, and telling hilarious jokes I will never be privy to,  I'm quarantined to my childhood bedroom.  And bathroom.  To hurl.

Luckily, I am a pity-party planner extraoridinaire.  And after a bit of cajoling I convinced my germaphobe brother to let me use his laptop, so I can conjure up some sympathy from my lovely readers (I am also a subtle hint-dropper extraordinaire)!  I will trade you one cute commercial for some sympathy.  Fair?  Awesome.  Here it is:

For The Love of Meijer

I'm not sure I've sung Meijer's praises in a while and back to school is just the occasion to do so.  My adoration for the Superstore can best be expressed in an ode.

Meijer,
Your employees are so kind
Though they know I'm out of my mind.
I come in 7 days a week
For various items that I seek:
Chick peas for cookies*, diapers and wipes,
Dog food, bubbles, and cheese- all types!
When I'm pregnant and it's midnight
And there's not a gummy worm in sight
Trust I'll be at the Meijer Superstore,
With gummy dinos, bears, and worms galore!
They take my icky cans and give me 10 cents each,
Then provide hand sanitizer- works as well as bleach!
When my kids start to melt down,
I simply purchase a bribe to erase her little frown:
"You want a ball, fruit snack, or fish?
A hula hoop?  Chapstick?  Whatever you wish!"
So you see dear Meijer, you save me 24 hours a day,
Even your commercials rock!  Readers, hit play!





*Reference 8/16/10 post.

My 1st Wordless Wednesday!

I've seen lots of great bloggers doing Wordless Wednesday, so I thought I'd jump on the (very quiet!) bandwagon.  Instead of a commercial, I present you with a bizarre (but totally the norm for them) Juicy Couture ad, that also offers a little hump day advice:

I love their completely weird ads- how can we make the general public desperately desire these sunglasses?  Why, by putting giant bunny ears on a freakishly pale model and encouraging them to "be silly" of course*!  I think this particular model should hit up the Palm Pre** folks for her next gig.  She's got the look.

*Note: It actually would be very silly of me to buy these way-out-of-my-SAHM-budget sunglasses, particularly when I go through a new pair every month, thanks to Adi, who loves bending and twisting them off my face.

**See 10/21/09 post for more info on this reference.Palm Pre- Trick or Treat?

Saying Nay to Chardonnay

If you and your friends are anything like mine, this commercial will speak to you.  Any time (I can think of two times, to be exact) I have declined an alcoholic beverage, my friends raise their eyebrows at me pointedly.  They need not say a word- I just shake my head and they (correctly) assume I'm still nursing a hangover (did you think I was going to say baby?!) from the previous night and simply cannot down one more glass of Merlot.  My close friends know me better though- if I am not drinking because I'm knocked up they would already know thanks to my Grand Canyon-esque mouth.  Basically, I would walk into their company and scream, "No drinks for me girls!  I'm preggo!  Just took the test, so according to my calculations I'm 4 weeks along!  2 weeks gestationally speaking!  I'll take a rum and Diet- hold the rum for this mum!"

I do appreciate this sweet Mama's lovely, composed demeanor though, and I love her friends for knowing that a lush like her would only turn down a drinkie drink for one reason and one reason only.

A Bird In The Hand...

The best parts of this commercial are (in chronological order):
1.  How Mike McGlone* says the word "bush"
2.  When the lady finds out her bird in the hand is worth two in the bush and shocked says, "Really?"  Why is this chick (the lady, not the bird figurine) only in commercials?  That is some good flappin' acting!

*Mike McGlone, as it turns out is not just a Brian Williams lookalike. 

He is also a musician!  As I surfed the web looking for his actual name I had the pleasure of finding his website.  Check this guy out- he's got a bit of everything going on.  Edgy.  http://www.michaelmcglone.com/v2/default.asp

Versed in Versatility

Christa at MushBrain has awarded me with the Versatile Blogger award!  Weee!  Who knew I was so versatile?  Certainly not me!  But I'm thrilled to get the award anyway!  Thank you lovely Christa- it's an honor to be named versatile by you!  Per the very stringent VBA rules, I have to share 7 things about me.  This is tricky because I'm pretty much an open book on Ad Bits- you guys already know a lot about me, but let's look for 7 more things.

1.  I don't like eggs.  Or seafood.  I've tried, but just don't care for it.
2.  My favorite reality show (the only one I watch, really) is The Biggest Loser.  Oo, and I do like to catch the Duggar family every now and then.
3.  My middle name is May.  It was my Grandma's middle name and is Adrienne's middle name too.
4.  I am a Diet Coke addict.
5.  I have a list of 138 goals (it's a work in progress).  To date, I've completed 49 of them. 
6.  My favorite kind of ice cream is Peppermint. 
7.  I've never smoked a cigarette.  (That's my best "I've Never" when playing the drinking game, "I've Never")

Whew!  Ok, now here's my favorite part- passing the award on!  I am happy to present the following blogs with the VBA:
Lizzie at The Bagel Factory.
Kimberly at The Stinker Pinkers
Carly at Wordy Owl

I haven't been following these girls for very long, but I love it when I find a blog and instantly feel connected to the blogger as I did with each of these ladies.  Now I'm checking out their each and every post!  I hope you love them as I do!

Reinventing The Squeal

I loved sports commercial week here on Ad Bits- I really did.  But I've been gagging to show you guys this ad for four days now!  Another talking pig commercial!  Why do I delight in this stuff like I do?  One of life's great mysteries, but I hope the world of advertising keeps 'em coming. 

Tomorrow my best friend's baby is being baptized, so I'm going on a mini road trip to be in attendance.  After my girlfriend had this sweet girl three months ago she found she couldn't remember the little piggy rhyme.  My bestie is not about to let a little memory lapse stop her, so she had her baby's piggies going to Barney's, Saks, Louis Vuitton, and the like.  My poor kids' toesies would have to be hitting up the $1 bin at Target. 

Wee Wee Wee hope you're having a fun weekend lovely Readers!

The Lies Have It

I love the raw honesty in this Subway commercial.  Actually, if I'm being honest here, I should mention I may have already featured this commercial a while back.  I certainly meant to because I think it's really funny.  That confession is just a little sampling of how honestly I try to live.  Here's some more truth for you- sometimes I fib.  Here are a few I've laid out there recently:
~"Sorry Mols, there aren't any cartoons on right now- go outside and play." (Please.  We all know cartoons are on 24/7 these days)
~"That's your favorite book ever, you say?  Yes, I liked it very much.  Thank you for the recommendation" (when just hours before I put the rotten thing under my car and ran it over raccoon roadkill style)
~"It's my pleasure.  I'm happy to help".  (this was in response to a committee I desperately wish I hadn't volunteered for.  Turns out it's a lot of um... work.)

So there you have it.  I'm a big, fat fattie fibber.  At least I'm honest about it.  Give it up for Subway and their ref-freshing referee.  Maybe he made the bad call because he's just a sub.  Or maybe they aren't paying enough dough to get a better ref.  I wouldn't know- I can't even tell the difference between a six inch and a foot ball.

It's Monday on Wednesday!

Ewwwwwww!  I just hit a raccoon!  Oh, it was already dead, but still.  It was huge (I don't know how I didn't see it) so my car really went up, up, up and over with that awful, dull thud.  I "ew ew ew'd" all the way home and when I got out of my car I could swear I smelled dead raccoon on my car.  I'm totally going through the car wash tomorrow. 

I should have opened sporty commercial week with a Monday Night Football ad, but I just wasn't that organized.  So, you're getting it (late) on hump day instead.  This ad is super appropriate for my day (sorry for the roadkill scene, but it was just too fitting)!  I love this guy*, because I too, have completely useless talents.  Of course, I've found the perfect job that capitalizes on such ridiculous gifts as: wiping bottoms, blowing rockstar raspberries, freeze dancing, and (forgive my big head!) my mad duck, duck, goose skillz.  Also, as my kiddos like to point out, my belly button makes a cool noise when tapped and my nose just begs to be slobbered on (that's Adi- bedtime ritual). 


*I hope for his sake he isn't a Lions fan or his job will be sunshine and rainbows compared to this football season.

Check Those Sources!

On my list of people I  would least expect to see on an ESPN commercial is Richard Simmons.  He's right down there with Marilyn Manson and Smurfette.

Yet, here he is- whipping the Sports Center team into shape.  Whipping them gooood.  It's a hilarious commercial, naturally- I would expect nothing short [shorts] of hilarity when it comes to Richard Simmons.  It's impossible NOT to smile around him.  I would know because I saw him at the Detroit airport once (I guess he was getting in his airobic workout).  Pow pow!  I wanted to Twist and Shout just being in the same building as him.  I have no doubt the ESPN team was sporting quite a glow by the time he was done with them.  It looks like he kicked their masscots.

Be A Good Sport

Fire up sports fans, because this week I'll be featuring sporty, athletic-y ads!  Think of the fun punballs we can toss around! This commercial puts a new spin on Air Jordan!  MJ's never heard of "bacon neck"- he thinks it's just bull.  What's MJ drinking?  Could it be Red Bull?  Whatever it is, he needs something to dunk in it.


Funny, right?  But it makes me hungry for some dang bacon.  Sizzle sizzle, pop pop!  Speaking of bacon, I was bakin' earlier today, and made chocolate chip cookies with a secret ingredient.... chickpeas.  I know it sounds gross, but they were surprisingly good.  Here's a picture- they look normal, right?  Honestly, they taste good too!  Thank you Deceptively Delicious- you truly are deceptive!

A New Hop

 I'm trying a new hop this Saturday!  Isn't this sun just darling?  To join in the hop, link up at: http://lucasjourneyspd.blogspot.com/  Hop on!

If I Didn't Answer When You Called....

I made it through Friday the 13th in one piece!  It had its ups and downs- let me just highlight one up and one down for you:
Up: Um, did you flipping SEE who commented on my post yesterday?!?  Caroline Leavitt!!!  The author of Girls In Trouble, one of the books I recommended a while back.  Her visit to Ad Bits made my whole day!  I'm not sure how she stumbled upon my little blog, but I am insanely pumped.  Of course, I am now ultra-aware of my all over the place writing style, my character building (i.e. there is none), and my foreshadowing, allusions, and symbolism (again, I got nothin').  I get inexplicably starstruck around authors.  Someday I'll tell you all about my attending the Decatur Book Festival, where I made such witty comments as, "Oh, right! Nothing like a baby's butt!" (that was directed toward Chuck Klosterman, who was very kind and patient as I waxed poetic about my kid's hiney).  Another doozie was: "Do you remember me?  Or am I not a person of significance?" (then I laughed loudly because I was trying to make a joke about something the author said in his talk- I got quite the pitiful look).  So ramble, ramble, babble, babble- authors intimidate me, but I'm still happy to see them stopping by my blog!

Down:  Jim had to kick the girls and I out of the house for a while because he was doing some crazy, messy project involving insulation and we needed to be out of the way.  The girls and I were starving so we headed to Burger King.  I'm not wild about BK, but desperate appetites call for desperately fast food.  The meal was successful (after a lovely family gave up the only high chair in the place for us).  Molly choked and spit her lemonade across the table at me; Adrienne learned how to clink cups and do "cheers".  Just another meal in the life.  Afterward I stopped for gas and then grabbed for my phone, and grabbed again, and again.  No phone.  It was immediately clear my phone was wrapped up in our greasy, salty, ketchupy napkins and sitting in the BK garbage.  Um.  Oops.  I was too humiliated to go back for it so my ahhhhhhmazing husband went back for me.  Ah, well.  If that's the best Friday the 13th can do then it's wussier than I thought!

Naturally, I've got a BK commercial for us to enjoy today (and bonus! the creepy-a** king isn't in it!)

Friday Is Cry Day

Don't be scared by this title; today's commercial is not actually going to make you cry because you are a sane, stable blog reader.  I, however, am a spastic, wimpy, Type A personality about some stuff, lover of commercials.  And cookies.  If you've been to my house you know I am not Type A-ish about say, housekeeping.  But I do have a desperate need to make my daughters the best of friends.  I want them to someday have wet-their-pants laughing so hard conversations about well... wetting their pants from laughing so hard.  I want them to have unique interests, but mutual beliefs.  When they go to college I want them to know each other's class schedules and call one another every day to discuss school, parties, and homesickness (because they will be very, very homesick, right?  Right?!).
These are lofty goals, but I know it's feasible because my parents somehow (unbeknownst to us at the time!) forced my brother, sister, and I into best frienddom.  Even now though, it is with great reluctance we would share (let alone give up) the last cookie.  I want to raise daughters who love each other enough to offer up the last beloved cookie.

You Otter Brush and Floss!

Molly had her first dentist appointment today!  Her Mommy is scared spitless (so to speak) of going to the dentist, but I must have succeeded in not projecting that fear because she was pumped to be in (what I used to think was) the scariest chair on earth.  Admittedly, I would not be such a wimp if I was babied the way these kids are.  Truly, I was at a floss for words; the office was a kid's dream- complete with an aquarium, touch screen video games, a train that ran around the ceiling, and a magic mirror in which the tooth fairy appeared when you knocked!  I wouldn't lie about this- it's the honest tooth.  I tried to make an appointment for myself, but the receptionist (who bore an uncanny resemblance to a fairy godmother) seemed to think I was joking.  Honestly, I wanted to stick around and not brush out of there.

Leave it to Axe to have a comical, semi-dirty dentist commercial.  Even funnier because the dentist is such a babyface!  I left my last dentist because they brought in a guy who was my age to work on  my teeth.  I'm no spring chicken, but I prefer a much more seasoned man working on my mouth, thank you very much.  (Yes, I realize how very wrong that sounded...)

I'm Versatile!

Ohmygoodness!  It is a lucky day!  I just received my very first blog award from Tina at The Floundering SAHM.  Thank you so so much!  It totally made my day Tina!  Here's a look readers:

Cool, huh?  Here are the responsibilities that come along with the award:

1.  Thank the person who gave you the award. (Of course!  Thank you again dear Floundering SAHM)

2.  List 7 things about yourself. (oh dear, I'll be careful not to humiliate myself too badly)

3.  Pass on the award to bloggers you've recently discovered.  (Official rules say 15, but I minimized- this is not an award to be given willy-nilly!)

Ok, here are my 7 things:

1.  I slept with a giant, purple hippo until I was 24.

2.  I was a sorority girl!  DeeGees 4eva!

3.  I'm a total teeny-bopper.  I have Miley Cyrus and The Jonas Brothers on my mp3 player (along with my more respectable BEP and Aerosmith).

4.  My all-time favorite book is Little Women.

5.  I love Boggle.  (what was that I was saying about not humiliating myself?)

6.  I actually did not major in versatile blog writing in college, but English and Communication.  So this is quite a surprise for me!

7.  Back in the day I was a ballerina and a figure skater, but my favorite sport is the much more contact-y hockey.

I am passing the VBA on to the following (in no particular order):

Margi @ Maverick Crafter

Nicki @ Nicki Woo- the Home Guru

Lisa @ Raising Future Leaders

Carmie @ The Single Nester

These are just a few of the great blogs I follow- swing by and check them out!

Lucky Number 200!

What is this?  Why yes, it is my 200th post as a matter of fact!  I feel like I should do something fun to celebrate.  Let's brainstorm... how do I normally celebrate things?  Well, eating of course.  I guess I could make a cake, but that's not much fun for you guys.  Here's the next best thing I guess- a recipe for a cake!  What's next?  Music and dancing!  I've got just the commercial for us today!  But I still feel like we're missing something.... ah!  Yes, that's it- a stupid pun.  We're missing a pun.  See below (if you dare).  There! Celebration complete!

Lemon Cream Cake
1/2 c vegetable shortening
1 c white sugar
3 eggs
1 tsp lemon juice
2 tsp grated lemon peel
2 c white flour
3 1/2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp salt
1 c sour cream
Preheat oven to 350.  Grease and lightly flour two 9 in. round cake pans.  Beat all ingredients together for several minutes until smooth.  Bake for approximately 20-30 mins. or until a toothpick comes out clean.  Do not overcook.  Cool completely before frosting.
Lemon Buttercream Frosting
1/2 c butter, softened
4 c confectioners' sugar
4-5 tbsp lemon juice
Cream the butter and sugar.  Add lemon juice one tablespoon at a time until desired consistency is achieved.  Add a few drops of yellow food coloring if you like.

A Drink In The Palm(er) Of My Hand

Happy Monday!  As you can see, Ad Bits has another new background.  I'm going to have to install a revolving door for all the background changes I've had lately.  I haven't found The One yet though, so there'll be more to come!

Weekend: was FUN!  And... productive!  A little productive at least.  Friday I attended a surprise anniversary party, which I loved.  The happy couple was shocked, but graceful (i.e. nobody wet their pants, as I would in all likelihood).  Saturday, I ran a 5K and achieved a PR.  I received not one, but TWO ears of corn upon crossing the finish line.  Funny, no?  Ear I am with my corn and friends.  We're cute- I hope nobody is stalking us.

Also Saturday, the girls and I went to my girlfriend's new home (lovely!) for a BBQ and corn hole tournament.  My new favorite summer drink was in attendance: lemonade and sweet tea vodka (try Jeremiah Weed or Fire Fly brands).  Kind of like an Arnold Palmer, but different and... drunkier.  Today's commercial pays a sort of homage to the drink.  Sunday was church, play, play, play with the girlies, and a visit from my brother (who, in all fairness, clued me in to this commercial).  And the productive part?  I crossed SIX things off my "to do" list.  How many items are on the list you ask?  Hey!  Let's not get into the particulars, ok?  Jeesh.

Saturday Blog Hop!

;

Last week's blog hop was so much fun I'm doing it again today!  I'm spotlighting "From Chaos Comes Happiness".  I stumbled on it this week and think it's adorable.  Check it out!  For a complete list of blogs participating in the hop, check out Kindred Spirit Mommy.  Also, below is another zappos.com commercial as promised.

Have a fun weekend! Steer clear of gators!

Fun Mail! No Strings Attached

Why are these Zappos.com commercials just now coming to my attention!  I saw one this morning and when I YouTubed it for this post there were a slew more!!!  Each funnier than the last!  Today I'm just going to show this one, but stay tuned this weekend for more!

At first I thought the puppets were a little creepy- a little too close to ventriloquist dummies that frequent my nightmares, but when I learned they were funny puppets (unlike most dummies) I was absolutely delighted!  A timely commercial too, because I received 3 fun things in the mail this week!  First, a knit kit for a Hello Kitty scarf I'm going to make Molly (will post pictures when complete, no doubt).  Secondly, the adorable monogrammed dance bag I got my cousin's daughter arrived (from Pottery Barn Kids- their latest catalog is just as pricey and fabulous as ever).  And finally, the slide for our swingset just came!  I love fun deliveries!!!  No wonder people have online shopping addictions.  But I can honestly say I was emotionally ready for all three items.

A final note before you actually watch the commercial.  Does the girl puppet look like Katey Sagal?  I'm just sayin'....

Pieland Island

I love Northern Michigan!  It's so relaxing and rejuvenating.  We're back from Mackinaw Island and it was a boatload of fun!  Here are the girls and I having a picnic after biking around all morning:

In honor of Northern Michigan I'm including a Kid Rock song for your rocking out pleasure.  In honor of islands, I've got an island commercial for you, and a Bud Light one at that!  All this island living got me thinking about the age old question: what books would I take with me to a dessert island?  (That's not a typo by the way.  My imaginary island has cupcakes falling from trees instead of coconuts, and pieces of pie walking around instead of crabs).  My list* changes daily, but here it is for today:
1.  The Harry Potter series. (yes, I count that as one giant book, ok?  It's my flippin' island.)
2.  To Kill A Mockingbird (which I may need to do, should I get sick of the sweets)
3.  Where the Red Fern Grows (a childhood fave- plus, I may get much needed hunting tips)
4.  Triathlon Training for Dummies (I may as well stay in shape, especially with all the fatty foods around)
5.  Hatchet (another childhood fave with beaucoup survival tips)

*This doesn't include the Bible of course.  That will be in the nightstand.  Oh, your imaginary island doesn't have a Hilton?  That stinks.

Inn and Out Of Service

I'm taking off!  The girls and I are going on a mid-week getaway!  Weeee!  And look at how rustic we are-- there is no internet service where we're headed.  Yikes.  Wish me luck!  There is cable however, so I will still be able to catch Pretty Little Liars.  I guess you can wish me luck on that front too.  Luck that I won't wake my kids with screams of terror.  Luck that I'll actually be able to sleep.  Luck that I don't wet the sofa.  Um, why do I watch this show again?

I'm loving this Hampton Inn commercial right now because it's funny, yes, but also because Adi's favorite trick right now is the same lip thing this hotel employee is doing.  I hope I'm not bragging when I say she's much cuter doing it. 

Hooray Beer!

I love Red Stripe's marketing ploy here.  In fact, I use the same kind of tactic myself sometimes.  A friend is complaining about being pasty white?  Just stand next to me and you'll look like you just got back from a va-cay in Jamaica!  Another (really annoying) friend* is worried about looking like a pig when we go out to dinner?  Sit next to me and you'll come out looking like Kate Moss on a diet!  Red Stripe also makes the very obvious, but very valid point that it is beer.  It will do the job, as long as the job isn't looking super classy or tasting good.  But get you drunk it will!**


*I haven't had friends that outwardly worry about looking like a pig since high school.  I had to purge those annoying buddies.  They just couldn't hang.
**That's an assumption.  I've never actually tried the stuff.  Or seen anybody else try it for that matter.  Have you?  How do they have a marketing budget?  Has anybody ever purchased Red Stripe?  A mystery!

McBillboards

What a fun weekend!  We actually didn't have much going on (for the last time this summer), which was just fine with me!  The big excitement was getting Molly a bike.  First preschool, now a bike?  I'm just making it easier and easier for her to leave me forever!  The other day, I was explaining how her first day of school would be so she would be prepared and we wouldn't have any meltdowns.  When I told her I'd go in with her she cried out in dismay, "No! I want to do it by myself!"  So in retrospect, the bike was probably a huge mistake.  Here she is riding it --->

Next thing you know she'll be drinking coffee.  But if she does start that habit I hope she rides her little princess bike right through the McDonald's drive-thru for a McCafe because I love their billboards.  Here's an oldish one I've always liked:

Their newest one is cute too.  It reads, "If coffee is Joe, consider this Joseph."  Hee hee.  Oh Mickey D, you're so sophisticated!  I have just one or two ideas for their next billboard:

"Coffee- it's so hot right now."

"A cuppa joe shouldn't cost more than a cuppa bucks."

"Mo Flava, Mo Energy, Mo for your money: Mocha."

McDonalds didn't stop at good billboards though- here's their McCafe commercial, which I also adore: