Friday, April 30, 2010

Pining For An Arbor Day Ad?

Look what I was able to dig up in honor of this hallow (or should I say hollow) day! Obviously an old ad, made a log time ago. These days they'd really have to spruce things up. I'm also posting a random Virgin Mobile ad because there are singing animals and you know I can't resist that shizzle, so just humor me if you wood. If Virgin Mobile actually meant this to be a sale generating ad however, they were barking up the wrong tree!! Okay, okay, let me just leaf you with this: if you normally only plant flowers, try branching out and planting a tree!

Thursday, April 29, 2010

A New Kind of Shake and Bake

Grilling at the Mitchell household will never be the same again thanks to Weber's new (very timely!) commercial. I can't wait to try some of these sweet moves with the spatula. Dancing with props has never been cooler. So don't be surprised if you see me whipping out a cooking utensil and swatting my behind at the next wedding reception, or when you run into me out clubbin'. (Actually if you see me out clubbin' be surprised, but not because of the spatula).
Molly recently humiliated me in front of a group of moms I did not know. The other sweet little munchkins were dancing innocently in a circle as kids do- jumping up and down, waving arms, etc. My Molly? Starts galloping backwards, butt out, and spanking herself. Apparently I should have sent a casting video to Weber instead of holing up in embarassment.
Before you click on this, stand up, grab the nearest hiney swatter, (no spatula handy? try a ruler, wooden spoon, or rolled up magazine) and get ready to break it down in honor of charred steaks, burgers, and brats everywhere.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Putting the PC in PCS

It's high time Metro PCS gets their due. They've always had funny commercials, but the new ad series with Tech and Talk Indians (Ranjit and Chad... obvious choices) is as funny as any talking animal ad I've seen. There was no doubt in my mind the Cavemen TV series spun off from Geico commercials would flop (I think my exact words were, "I'd rather be clubbed in the head than watch this"). But Ranjit and Chad? Now that could be a series. Or a movie. I'm thinking Harold and Kumar meets Anchorman. Who's with me? Oh, you want to see the commercial first? My readers are wise investors!

I'm thinking Will Ferrell or Adam Sandler to play the guy in the tube. Or maybe Russell Crowe, just because I'd like to see him in a tube.

Friday, April 23, 2010

Three Cingular Sensations

I had a glorious flashback today. Three of them to be specific. Do you remember the triplets from the Cingular ads? Of course you do! They reached the zenith of commercial celebrity. That is, they landed a few actual interviews with teeny-bopper 'zines. How do I remember this? Because I was hanging out (this was before high schoolers were "chillaxing") at my friend's house, thumbing through said teeny-bopper rags, when my friend came to an article about the Karshner trips (Nick, Craig, and Ryan- perfect boy band names. Why they never started a band to tour with O-Town is beyond me). So friend wants to kiss all three boys. Their pictures, that is. Since there are three of them, she started with Boy A and slid her face across the page, ending with Boy C. The result? A nasty papercut under her nose.

In researching for this blog entry I googled the Karshner trips (they've made quite a name for themselves in the gay community!) but couldn't find what they're up to these days. Still modeling for Abercrombie? That would be some kind of record- especially since they're 28 now, and I don't think A&F has models over the age of 19. So who knows? They're like the Bobby Fischer of attractive triplet actor/models. But I did find this little blurb on them: Don't want to read it? That's cool- let me just pull out this little bit for you: "The story line of their last commercial that they just finished filming (and which will air this fall) will be about their characters going to college; one of them is heading for a university like Yale or Harvard, and the other two are heading for junior colleges".
Now watch the commercial and tell me if you get the same vibe. Let me just say first that I don't think you will. I think you will find the above quote hysterical, stupid, and quite unfounded. But please, correct me if I'm wrong.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Sun Chips Say What?! (More On SC's New Bag)

When I went to "x" out of YouTube just now, I noticed a slew of Sun Chips videos on the side of my screen with titles like, "Sun Chips LOUD" and "New Sun Chips Bag Will Wake the Dead". So I clicked for the fun of it. As I said it my previous post- I support the crinkly new bag because it entertains Adi while I shop, which is priceless for me. However, knowing there are so many individuals who take issue with the new bag, I feel I would be remiss should I not give my readers both sides of the crunchy bag story. I picked this gentleman (kid?) as spokesman for all anti-crinkly-bagonites. His disdain at the end speaks volumes to this very important issue. If you ask me, he has a bit of a chip on his shoulder. Hee hee.

Happy Earth Day!

Never say I'm not eco-friendly! Look at me, all supporting Earth Day by featuring a compostable bag of Sun Chips on my blog. In fact, I'll do ya one better- I'll personally endorse the product! (You owe me big time Sun Chips. An AdBits' endorsement will send sales through the roof. Your 2nd quarter sales are going to be huge- we're talking national deficit huge). Here we go:

1. Sun Chips are healthy. Practically like eating handfuls of multi-vitamins. Critical to those of us working to take off 5 pounds before wedding season.
2. The bags are not only good for Madame Earth, but extra crinkly, giving cranky babies a fun distraction while desperate mommies are shopping.
3. Have you tried the Garden Salsa flavor? Lord have mercy, they are tasty.

Thank you Sun Chips for being green you. Thank you Michigan for having a 10 cent refund on pop cans. Thank you Dora the Explorer for saving the mermaids from a sludge filled ocean on today's episode. Thank you one and all, green AdBits readers!

Saturday, April 17, 2010

What A Hoot!

It seems like the funniest commercials are targeted toward men; probably 90% of the ads I blog about are ones I caught during a sporting event (the other 10% during Biggest Loser of course). Yesterday though, I had the humiliating (but worth it!) experience of busting out in a fit of laughter while on the elliptical at the gym. (Everyone already thinks I'm a spaz I'm sure, as I've been known to cry during Regis and Kelly's mom makeovers). And I have Playtex to thank. Incontinence victims beware: the church/nightclub portion of this commercial is wet your pants funny. Also noteworthy is the chick at second 29. Clearly familiar with the motorboat technique*

Be on the lookout for another commercial Playtex has out regarding the swoob** problem sweeping the nation.

* Unfamiliar with motorboating? Please immediately check out Wedding Crashers; I love you Vince Vaughn, you motorboating sonofabitch.
**"swoobs": short for "sweaty boobs" or "swamp boobs"; cousin to swass.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

A WONDERful Commercial

Why is this commercial so awesome? Because throwing punches is almost always funny! I particularly love the pregnant lady slugging her husband (that's probably just the first of many until that baby is OUT) and of course the Amish punch. I'm pretty confident hitting of any kind goes against their core Amishnisity (and I think I'm completely entitled to comment on Amish principles because an Amish dude stood up in my wedding), but the beauty of having Amish in your advertisement is that you can portray them however you darn well please and they'll never know! Likewise, you can say whatever you like about them in your blog! (Although that's totally a moot point, since nobody ever has anything bad to say about the Amish, except maybe if you get stuck behind a buggy on your way to buy the darling capris that are on sale today only, or if you ate an entire loaf of their dang irresistible sourdough bread, thus ruining your low-carb diet for the day).
And let's talk about Stevie Wonder for a second. First Aretha Franklin shows up in a Snickers commercial and then Stevie Wonder lands a role in a VW spot? Let's hear it for Motown! It's good to see your faces again My Cherie Amours! Especially in comedic roles- I love that Stevie slugs T. Morgan as if it's a Superstition. It's truly a Wonder he would know the make and color of the car driving by, right? Ugh, those are stretches I know. I'll wrap this up and put you out of your misery. This post is hereby Signed, Sealed, Delivered. I'm Yours, Jules.

Thursday, April 8, 2010


An embarrassing correction: Aretha Frankenstein's is not actually in downtown Nashville, but downtown Chattanooga. Which is infinitely more fun to say anyway. Thank you Molly for setting your dumb friend straight!

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Puns To Snicker At

Snickers, I'm here to tell you, it is enough that you are a heavenly concoction of deliciousness. Your choco-caramel-nuttiness is enough in and of itself. But then. Then! You deliver in the ad department as well, bringing us Betty White playing football (see 2/17/10 post) and now Aretha Franklin! Who has never done an ad spot as far as I can remember. Leave it to you, Snickers, to bring her out of apparent commercial spot snobbiness. You are clearly a product she can R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Only a Chain Of Fools wouldn't love her in this commercial. Okay, okay, don't get your (s)knickers in a bunch- I'll stop. Just know- the moment I wake up, before I put on my makeup, I say a little prayer for you.

Note: As if writing this post isn't making me hungry enough! I am reminded of a fabulous little restaurant I went to in downtown Nashville, while visiting my good friend, Molly. If you're ever in town you must go to Aretha Frankenstein's. Get their pancakes and their biscuits. Yes, that is a lot of carbs, but you will be indebted to me eternally for the recommendation. So you're welcome.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

One Last Post

HAPPY APRIL FOOL'S DAY! Please! I love cracking my bloggy self up way too much to just abandon my very own ego-forum! Plus there are mucho commercials out there that need my commentary! Take this one for instance. It came on the other day while I was eating and I lost. my. appetite. That is a huge deal because I am never without appetite. I've never seen "Deliverance", but I imagine these characters would have fit in nicely (any "Deliverance" fans out there? Am I wrong?)

Here's another bizarre and disgusting Skittles commercial. (That made me laugh).

And that's the whole sKITtles and caboodle!

Au Revoir Petite Ad Bitters

Devoted Ad Bitters,
It is with a great deal of reluctance that I am discontinuing Ad Bits. You may have noticed increasing lag time between posts lately as I find it harder and harder to find the time to blog. Please keep Bitting Ads with all your heart and soul.

Blogging Off,